Thanksgiving came so fast this year. I couldn't believe it! I wasn't completely prepared for seeing my whole family after just giving my son up for adoption. I didn't know how people would react or how they would even act around me. It wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I know that at first people were a little apprehensive about talking to me. My guess is they weren't sure what to talk to me about because they didn't know how I would take it. They all finally started to calm down and I even brought my photo album of photos of Ashden (from the hospital all the way to his first "One Week Old" professional pictures. That helped everyone relax a little bit a think. It was a good Thanksgiving and lots of food. The one major thing I'm Thankful for this year is the wonderful Adoptive Parents that I picked out for my son...they really are amazing!
I got a call from my adoption worker the Tuesday before Thanksgiving telling me that B and T had sent me a Thanksgiving card and a little art project from Ashden. I had her read me the card and I was in tears at my office. Haha. It was a beautiful letter and it was so wonderful to have them send something to me even when they didn't have to! They even sent me his first art project. :-) It was when he turned a month old and all he really contributed to it was his hands and feet. They used orange paint to put a foot print and a hand print on a card for me. I am so happy I picked this family! They are going above and beyond what they were even expecting...
They went into the adoption process of not really wanting to have an open adoption and they've come all the way around to sending me cards, texting me and even a phone call already. I guess that goes both ways. I at first was against having visitations. I just wanted to receive pictures. Then I stepped it up to pictures and a letter. Then it went to pictures, a letter with the pictures, and visitation once a year. They have been so thoughtful of me through the whole process and it really has helped me out a lot. When they send me cards they always send them to Joe and I (yes Joe is my dog). They are huge animal lovers and that is one of the biggest reasons I picked them. So they always include Joe in their letters to me and when they sign the cards they always say from T, B, Ashden and Carisma, Jake and Bailey too (their cat and two dogs). It's great fun!
I am still doing ok. I have an appointment with a councleor tomorrow. I don't know how long I'll keep going but part of me just feels like I am not completely coping with everything. I don't know if I am and I'm just doing so well because of how awesome B and T are or if I'm just trying to avoid my real emotions. So I'm hoping that I can figure out exactly how I'm feeling so I can stop overthinking things.
School is almost out...my last final is Dec 11th and then it's finally the start of the Christmas break and then KSU here I come!
PS: I scanned Ashden's first art project so I could have an electronic version...enjoy!